He mends me
by Night Shade10
Summary: This is my first FanFic so please read and review. Warning: Slash... Mild slash...


He Mends Me  
  
"God, he`s gorgeous. Can`t believe I never noticed that before," he whispered to himself while watching his lover sleep. He formerly breathed in every detail of the other man. Memorized the picture of perfect innocence and perfect calm. Every line on his pale, beautiful face. Every blond hair on his head. And every curve on his flawless body. Xander sighed and slipped carefully under the covers, afraid to wake up the vampire next to him. "Good night, love," he said softly and kissed the tip of Spike`s nose. Then he turned of the lights and fell asleep on the vamp`s chest.  
  
The next morning the two men woke up to the sound the phone ringing. Xander  
  
dragged himself out of bed to answer it.  
  
"Hello?"  
  
"Hi Xander! What`s up?"  
  
Xander drew a deep breath. "Hey Wills... Nothin` special. You?"  
  
"I`m fine in spite of the occasion." Willow sighed and hoped that Xander would remember. No answer. "God, Xander. It`s been a year."  
  
"Shit! I`m so sorry Willow! I didn`t remember that it had been that long already." He ran his fingers through his hair and asked himself how he could have forgotten that it had been a year since Buffy died.  
  
"It`s okay... It really don`t seem that long. I have already visited the grave today and put down some flowers."  
  
"That`s good! Ey, Wills, I gotta go. Have to find my shower. You woke me up, you see. Talk to you later, ok?" Xander had suddenly realized that he smelled really bad.  
  
"Ok. You do that. I`ll call you later. Love you, Xan!"  
  
"Love you too," he said with a smile before he hung up.  
  
Xander had moved from Sunnyhell a week after the death of the Slayer, who weirdly enough had died in a carcrash. No demonic interfierness what so ever. All the former 'Scoobies' knew that they both had moved, but not that they had moved together. Or the fact that the twoguys had been lovers for several months before the accident.  
  
"Who was it, luv?" Spike turned around so he could face Xander without getting out of bed.  
  
"Willow. She wondered how I was. Being a year to day since Buffy died, I mean." Xander got back into bed and snuggled up next to his partner.  
  
"Ooh... That`s today? I knew it was around this time, but couldn`t remember the exact date. Well! I`m not planning to mope around all day `cause of something in the past. We can`t bring her back this time. Right?" The blonde vampire searched the other man`s face for traces of old sorrow.  
  
"You`ve got a point. I don`t want to dwell on the past. I rather want to look forward at the future. Our future," said Xander and caught Spike`s lips in a slow sensuel kiss that grew more and more passionate as hands were added in the mix. Xander let his fingers run up and down the blonde`s spine and his other hand petted a very sensitive spot at the back of Spike`s neck. At the same time his own back being stroked and scratched by sharp nails. The dark haired boy moaned into the mouth of his lover as he felt cool hands move down to his butt and fingers circling his tight and shivering entrance. He crept slightly up Spike`s body so his lover should get better access. When the vamp let one finger slide in, Xander felt his cock harden against the smaller man`s perfect abs. At the same time he could also feel Spike`s limb caressing his inner thigh. Xander reached in between them, gripped the vampire`s cock and started to pump it.  
  
"Oh god, Xan! I need you... NOW! Turn around." Spike pushed Xander off himself and reached for the tube of lube on the nightstand. He put some on his fingers and started preparing his boyfriend quickly. When he was sure that it was enough, he grabbed some more lube and put it all over his own aching cock. He put the bottle away, turned and took a good hold of Xander`s hips and nearly slammed into him. His entire length in one hard thrust.  
  
"OH GOD! So good, so good, so fucking good!" Xander screamed as he felt Spike`s cold cock started to move, hitting his prostate with every little movement. He could allready feel his balls tighten and every muscle in his body began to stiffen and shiver at the same time.  
  
"Don`t wanna cum yet! Don`t wanna cum yet!" he halfway said and halfway moaned, but when he heard the vamp roar and felt fangs piercing the skin on his neck, he came like a storm all over himself and the sheets under him. That was what it took to get Spike over the edge. The combination of Xander cumming and the salty-sweet taste of his blood on his tongue. He thrusted into his lover once more before the orgasm sent his dead sperm in cool waves into Xander`s body.'  
  
"Xaandeer," he screamed the second before he collapsed on top of the other man.  
  
"I love you, Spike," Xander said between heavy breaths.  
  
"I love you too, pet," he whispered before they both fell asleep.  
  
About a week later Xander was back in Sunnydale for a quick social visit. Willow had called him and asked if he could come back for Tara`s birthday, and he couldn`t let her down. The witches had been two of his best friends for a long time.  
  
"Happy birthday, Tara." Xander hugged the blonde and gave her the present he had bought her.  
  
"Oh thank you, Xander," she said while she removed the paper. It was a little spellbook and all the things she needed to preform a spell he knew she had wanted to try for a long time.  
  
"Well. I hope you like it." He smiled at the two girls. They had been a couple for quite some time now. They were entirely open about their relationship, and Xander wished that he had the guts to tell them what he shared with the vampire.  
  
"I sure do!" Tara smiled.  
  
"Xander, we miss you. Why don`t you move back to Sunnydale? It`s been so empty here without you." Willow looked at him hopefully.  
  
"I`ve missed you too, but I can`t be here and watch all the evil and not be able to do anything about it! When Buffy died and the new Slayer and her 'crew' showed up. Well. I can`t do that." He suddenly decided to tell them. "Besides, I can`t leave Spike!" Spike had said that it was up to him when he chose to tell his friends in Sunnydale. All the friends they had made after they moved had known from day one, about the relationship not the vampire-thing, but then again. That was different. Xander looked at the witches. They seemed to be paralyzed and he could read surprise all over their faces.  
  
"What?" Willow were the first to speak. "What do you mean by 'can`t leave Spike'? Damn! I need an explanation."  
  
"Well. As you know Spike moved from town at the same time as me last year. We moved in together. Spike and I are a couple. Like we were for three months before Buffy died. I`ve never loved anyone as much as I love him," Xander drew his breath, "not even Anya."  
  
"Ey, I knew you were gay, I`ve got my gay-dar you know, but I never guessed that the object of your affection is AN ANCIENT, SOULLESS, EVIL VAMPIRE! God! What were you thinking?"  
  
"It just happened. And I`m glad it did! I love him! Of all the people I know I thought you would understand and support me, even though I`ve used a long time to work up the guts to tell you. But I guess I was wrong, 'cause what do I get thown in the face? How dumb what I`m doing is? Well, it`s not dumb! You don`t know him like I do. He loves me!" By that time Xander felt his eyes welling with tears. "I can`t come back here. Ever. I will never belong! I belong with the man I love. Either you approve or not!" With those words he got his coat and nearly ran to the door.  
  
"Happy birthday!" He slammed the door as he left. He got in his car and drove out of Sunnydale as quickly as he could. As he was driving he felt the tears running down his face. He had lost his best friend. Of course he and Spike were also very good friends, but nothing like he and Willow had shared for so many years.  
  
"Shit!" He pounded his fist against the wheel of the car. "SHIT!" He started to cry so hard that he had to stop the car because he couldn`t see the road anymore. And it was still a one-and-a-half-hour drive until he was back home with Spike. When he had calmed down that much that he regained his eyesight he drove on, keeping the thought of the vampire waiting for him in the apartment on his mind as an attempt to share himself up. It helped a little.  
  
After an hour an a quarter he was home. He nearly fell in the door and into Spike`s arms.  
  
"What`s wrong, luv?" Spike got extremely worried when he saw his boyfriend`s face. Xander`s eyes were red and swollen and there were tears running down his cheeks.  
  
"I`ve lost my best friend," he replied between sobs, and then he told Spike the entire story fron when he got to witches house until he came home. "I feel like I`ve lost a part of myself."  
  
"There there, pet." The blonde vampire out his arms around the crying man, and led him over to the couch.  
  
"Come here, luv. It`s gonna be allright." Spike continued to talk soothingly to Xander while rocking him back and forward. Xander felt the tension flee from his body as Spike`s hands gently stroked his back and hair. He felt the other man`s lips against his forehead. He could almost feel himself being put back together.  
  
~Xander~  
  
I have days when I feel useless, weak. All in all broken. But then HE comes along. He takes me in his arms, strokes my hair, kisses my forehead and tell`s me everything`s gonna be allright. Then I look into his eyes and I feel strong. And but one thought runs through my mind; He mends me... 


End file.
